The Curious Case of My Reproductive Health | by Jean Grant

By Intuitive Tarot Reader & Breathwork Practitioner Jean Grant  (Want to work with Jean? Book your session HERE.)

The Curious Case of my Reproductive Health

July 2018. It was a Blood Moon eclipse and all the planets were in retrograde. Energy was intense.

I had just gotten back to the Los Feliz dream apartment: dozens of house-plants, white shag rugs, a big screen with Apple TV and four cats — petsitting in LA. That evening, the cats were the last thing on my mind. I had very long nine-hour workday at the epicenter of misogyny and racism. My white male superiors had either called me Sweetie, intentionally withheld crucial information from me and their superiors, who were Latina women, or convinced me I was unquestionably invisible. But when one of them scream-accused me of calling him a racist after I suggested to hire more women and non-white people on the project, my body collapsed into a boiling anxiety attack. So, the Fancy Feast could wait. I needed my remedy stat: Stephen King’s multiverse of Castle Rock.

But before I could turn on the television, my lower abdomen caved inward like a sixteen-foot ocean swell. I collapsed on the couch to fetal position. The four cats emerged and studied me, curious to why their food provider was pale and moaning. Even Swayze, the oversized-wannabe-alpha cat, dropped his bully persona to lick my wrist. This was validation that something was terribly wrong.

I’ve had irregular periods since I was fourteen. Whether I was on my cycle every two weeks or stained my favorite pair of jeans on day three, I had accepted that an unpredictable period was the norm. This norm included constipation, borderline anemia, and tolerable exhaustion levels. At every pap-smear — a woman’s favorite biannual doctor’s visit— multiple gynecologists drilled into me I that as a twenty-something, I was too young for anything serious. They only offered was birth control and I always politely declined.

Over the days that followed that Blood Moon eclipse, I bled through super-plus tampons every fifteen minutes. My coping included fetal position as much as possible, tampons with pads, black jeans always, coffee and more coffee to feel any kind of alive. The same cycle happened in September. And again, in October. Clearly, my ovaries decided this was my new norm.

One excruciating vaginal exam later, my gynecologist concluded my cervix looked very healthy. She said, again, that at twenty-nine years old I was too young to have any polyps — which cause heavy bleeding — then prescribed me constipation-inducing iron pills and asked if I want to go on birth control to help control the bleeding. And again, I politely declined.*

During this time of period woes, I was working a twelve-to-fifteen hour day job for less than a living wage and with no overtime. One day, I was running office errands and I was hit by a car and had a concussion so bad I was on disability. By doctor’s orders, I took time off and came to the realization that if I was numbing gender discrimination, work exploitation and monsoon menstruations with supernatural horror, I had some spiritual healing to do. My sister lived in Iquitos, Peru and told me of Otilia, a female shaman, who held Ayahuasca ceremonies. A woman who does plant medicine in the Amazon? I was sold.

It took me three international flights, a tuk tuk motorbike, a 2004ish SUV shuttle, and a forty-five minute trek through a flooded jungle trail to get to Otilia’s healing centre. It was rustic: a dilapidated mosquito netted common area, a dorm style open house with creaking wood floors and rattling tin roof, black frog infested toilets, and a sublime soundtrack of Amazonian fauna and a rooster. Otilia had a casual yet, earthy presence. I had to meet her first in Iquitos so she could see if Ayahuasca was right for me. Over papaya juices, Otilia observed me for what seemed like hours — it was ten minutes — while a translator explained what the four day itinerary would look like. Fortunately, I passed her test due to the light in my eyes. On my first night in the jungle, I heard Otilia call “Señorita!” from the dirt basement below my room. I walked downstairs to the basement, believing we were going to have a welcome dinner. Also, it had been hours since my last meal and I was starving. But to my surprise, Otilia was sitting at a table with white candles, a large fan constructed out of leaves, and plastic water bottle with a thick, burgundy mixture inside. The ceremony was about to begin. At that point I threw the said itinerary out the window.


To make matters more fun, I was on my period. Otilia reassured me it was another form of detoxing, that I had nothing to worry about. So, instead of vomiting profusely, I bled profusely.** Cut to six hours and a lot of strange visions later: a smiling Otilia walked over to my weak and Jello-like body. She told me I had stomach issues from “swallowing a sadness that wasn’t my own” that it was “pulsating to come out.” Also, that my periods were like a pendulum, swinging from good to bad. I was shocked to how accurate she was as I didn’t tell her any of my physical or emotional ailments beforehand. Then, she sang me her icaros, a sacred prayer song from the mother Ayahuasca, to heal my ailments.

I returned to Los Angeles a week later and felt rebooted. My period was significantly lighter, but the duration still stretched anywhere from eight to twelve days. The following spring, my cycle significantly changed. I was in a relationship with a man that was very different from my past romantic stints. To put it simply, I finally felt safe. Physically, emotionally, and everything in between. Those brief months we were together, my periods were shorter, constipation wasn’t an issue, and I had energy.

After the relationship ended, my following cycle was the period of all periods: the period that lasted over two months. Two physician assistants, four doctors, too many nurses and receptionists who couldn’t efficiently communicate, over twenty vials of blood work, and a mandatory Emergency Room visit later, I still had no answers or treatment. My ultrasound showed I had fibroids but one physician’s assistant couldn’t read my results. One OBGYN told me it was definitely causing my bleeding. Another specialist told me that it was too small to cause that much bleeding. The OBGYN who was convinced it was the fibroid, put me on birth control to temporarily stop the bleeding until I could get the fibroid surgically removed. The birth control not only made me feel like anxiety was oozing out of my pores but made me bleed even more. So, we tried a higher dosage of two pills a day. Nope. Tidal waves of blood. I was too exhausted to go about my day: to work, to drive, to cook, to clean my apartment, to walk my dog, to sleep. Even my therapist, frightened by my pale LA summer skin and the dark circles under my eyes, convinced me to call my OBGYN for an appointment. If my therapist was frightened, I knew it was serious.

The next day, a finger prick blood sample revealed my hemoglobin levels were at 7.4, which meant I was very anemic. Immediately, My OBGYN ordered me to the ER for a blood transfusion. Five hours after going through the same tests I had in the last two months, my hemoglobin levels were at 9.4 — not low enough for a transfusion. The male nurse, annoyed, glared at my seemingly healthy body taking up space in his ER bed. He explained to me what the hospital considered to be an “emergency.” An echo of my women-hating bosses a year later. No remedy could numb me now. My reproductive health had literally turned into The Shining.

After my ER visit, I felt hopeless. I didn’t know how to move forward with my health, but more so with my life. I felt the last year I was constantly seeking for answers outside of myself. It was that moment, I knew I had go in. Do the inner work. It hit me in a meditation that I had to heal naturally, as if Ayahuasca was whispering it in my ears. That night, I stopped taking the birth control cold turkey. The next day, I booked an appointment with a homeopathic MD for the following week.

My homeopathic session was like therapy on steroids.

“What was going on in your life when the heavy bleeding started?” my doctor asked.

“I was working a stressful job with bosses who hated women” I replied.

“Describe a particular moment with your bosses. How did you feel in that moment? What did that feeling feel like? What was the texture? Temperature? Keep going.”

The process was relentless. I ended up talk-crying about my anxieties and fears, how I would be stuck in my restricted body, how I was afraid of being punished and loosing my reputation, something that’s been engrained in me since my childhood. After the consultation, it was clear that my health issues were my body telling me what my core fear was. Not surprisingly, it was aligned with what my shaman told me months before. The only difference was I told myself.

After my doctor consulted with a fellow homeopathic doctor, he prescribed me a remedy of three tiny white pellets.

“What is the remedy?” I asked.

“It’s from the Earth.”

Apparently, he didn’t want me to get in my head or Google about it until our next follow up in six weeks’ time. However, he did tell me that the remedy would release what is making me ill and amplify my energy. He told me to continue to do things that bring me joy like yoga, walking in nature, spending time with positive people, eating chocolate cake*** and to steer clear of activities that were violent — sorry, Stephen King. So, I took my dose of the mysterious three tiny white pellets and the following day, my period stopped. Seventy-six days of bleeding and it finally stopped. I had never felt so relieved, so energized, and so what-the-fuck?

As I look back on this entire year from the Blood Moon and all the planets in retrograde, I find it serendipitous that Jupiter, the planet of good fortune, started to go in direct the day before my homeopathy consult. It’s been a couple months since taking the remedy and I’m still period, constipation, exhaustion free, and still baffled how three tiny white pellets from the Earth cured me. Perhaps that’s the point. You and I may never know the answers but we can listen ourselves, the strange and mysterious language of our intuitive bodies and cosmos, for it will always lead us to our true path.


* After trying “the shot” one time when I was twenty, I felt crazy-hormonal-weird and it made me gain weight and made me never have my period, which induced my “what if I’m pregnant even if I haven’t been sexually active?!” anxiety.

** Don’t worry, I had my share of vomiting profusely after my second ceremony.

*** Yes, a Doctor of Medicine prescribed me chocolate cake.


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We often hear that the leading cause of our problems is within ourselves. But so is the solution.

It may seem far-fetched, but the power to solve all of our physical and emotional issues, whether it’s health, relationships, career, finances, self-esteem, or something else, is in our hands.

Metaphysical counseling helps us uncover the root of our suffering and address it accordingly. Let’s find out how!

Great for: Transitions, getting to the next level, breaking free of limiting beliefs or blockages, empowering one to believe in themselves, having accountability through your goals

what is metaphysics

Metaphysics is the most abstract branch of philosophy that deals with the first principles of existence. In Greek, the word metaphysics means “after the things of nature”.

Metaphysics examines the very nature of reality. It offers explanations for phenomena that cannot be explained by “natural” science or that are “beyond the physical”.

This science studies the individual as a whole, as a physical and spiritual being.

Certain types of chakra healing and other holistic, spiritual healing practices, personal development, and even business coaching are based on metaphysics. They typically include working on physical, mental, and spiritual aspects of one’s being to resolve issues that person is facing.

The fundamental law of metaphysics is that every action or decision causes a reaction or an effect. Everything that happens to us (positive or negative) results from past actions or decisions in this lifetime or before the present life.

Similarly, everything we do now will have an effect on our life in the future. This law is better known as karma (action).

It is also believed that we must resolve our life’s issues in this lifetime.

What is metaphysical counseling?

Metaphysical counseling is based on the principle that everyone is sent by the Soul (higher self) to grow at all levels of their being through their life experiences and the lessons they learn in life.

Sometimes referred to as spiritual or transpersonal counseling, it represents a whole person approach – body, mind, and spirit. This type of counseling helps us better understand our life experiences by explaining aspects that our senses cannot perceive.

To put it simply, metaphysical counseling is a form of therapy that empowers us to empower ourselves.

There are many ways metaphysical counseling can take place. This will depend on the practitioner you choose, the kind of spirituality they practice, and the specific issues you may be looking to address.

Some counselors will advise you on the use of crystals for healing, while others will stress the importance of prayer.

This is why it is essential to find a counselor whose beliefs align with yours. Otherwise, your counseling might not have the desired effect.

What can metaphysical counseling help us with?

Metaphysical counseling is a type of holistic-approach therapy based on spiritual principles. This psycho-spiritual approach helps people live a more authentic life by making conscious choices.

It is a self-empowering therapy that gives us the tools to identify and address the imbalances in our belief system that cause conflict and prevent us from achieving success and happiness. These beliefs are so subconscious that we aren’t always aware of them.

With the help of a therapist, people can discover the fundamental causes of their suffering and reach a solution through self-discovery.

It is all about learning to utilize our own self-healing power to reinstate harmony.

This can apply on multiple levels – physical, emotional, mental, or spiritual. Good metaphysical counseling will address all of those.

What does a metaphysical counselor do?

A metaphysical counselor is capable of healing not only the human mind but the body as well. They can help with various mental issues, including depression, anxiety, and loneliness, or any physical illness, by offering guidance and support to their clients.

A metaphysical counselor can help us navigate our way to health, success, strength, or anything else we desire. They also help clients understand their spiritual nature in this lifetime and beyond.

Each counselor will have their own approach; some will focus on the metaphysical properties of the things around you and how to use those to your benefit, while others will prefer working on your own inner world.

We are all exposed to various positive and negative influences that shape our daily actions, thoughts, and reality. Negative impacts lead to issues like anxiety, negativity, and close-mindedness.

Metaphysical counseling aims to free people from these negative influences and their effects.

Gaining a better understanding of ourselves and our connection to the physical and spiritual world surrounding us with the help of a metaphysical counselor gives us the ability to recognize these harmful influences and build a defense mechanism.

The root of these problems lies deeper than the physical, mental, or emotional sphere. To find a solution, we must target the source. And that lies at the deepest and wisest level of our being – the level of the Soul. Many life situations can only be addressed through the metaphysical laws, and the soul factor is always present. Metaphysical counselors teach us numerous powerful techniques and spiritual principles we can utilize to find the greater good in any challenging situation.

They give us the tools to find a solution to our life issues without a struggle, using less energy in the process.

What to expect from your first metaphysical counseling session

During the first session, the client answers a series of questions regarding their life and the issues that are troubling them.

The counselor listens attentively to understand not only the surface issue but also the stressful beliefs and patterns that are causing the problem.

Further steps depend on the specific type of counseling and the counselor you choose. But after a counseling session, the goal is for clients to experience a greater sense of inner peace and well-being.

Not a one-size-fits-all approach

Metaphysics is a versatile form of therapy, so it can be adjusted to the client’s changing needs as the sessions develop.

Therapists use a variety of counseling skills and techniques. They usually determine which method is the most suitable, depending on the client’s condition at that moment.

For example, you may focus on meditation to prepare yourself for success but turn to more conversation-based therapy to deal with anxiety.

As you and your counselor work together, you will find what works best for you personally. This is one of the significant benefits of metaphysical approaches – they are highly flexible.

Metaphysics can be applied to almost any condition and is incredibly helpful with issues regarding:

mental health
challenges in the workplace
relationship issues
dealing with stress and anxiety
understanding emotional reactions
unlocking habitual patterns